Together We Will Survive

          As a single mother of an autistic child, I have faced many difficulties. There were times when I was very depressed and could not help but question my destiny. However,I am completely sure that behind every hardship there is a lesson to be learned,and because of that it has made me a stronger and better person. I also learned
that I was not alone. I met many people who have been through the same kind of pain. I believe that when friends with the same problem stick together,they will strength.
          The world seemed to end when I learned that my only child,Ikhsan,had autism. I became aware that he was autistic because of the sympt0ms he sh0wed. First,his verbal intelligence was so low that he could not comprehend simple instructions like"Go get your shoes". Responding when his name was called was a difficulty for him. Sometimes I even thought he was deaf. Second, he was unreachable; he lived in his own world. He did not feel at ease communicating with people and always avoided eye contact. The fact that he did n0t kn0w h0w t0 express his feelings really made me struggle to get him to interact with other. He came to me only when he needed something-definitely n0t t0 interact with me. Third,he had an unusual concentrati0n span. It could be extremely long or unbelievably sh0rt. He could look at a certain sp0t f0r h0urs with0ut m0ving or saying anything but at other times,he also f0und it stressful t0 have t0 f0cus on one thing that was n0t t0 his liking.
           With high h0pes, I decided to put my s0n in a special sch0oL but many of the schools rejected him because his case was c0nsidered 'too severe'. Fortunately, I finally f0und a special school in Lebak Bulus with a very c0operative and understanding school administrat0r. In this school I met Aty Zafar, wh0se s0n, Farid, was also an autistic child. Aty was a nice pers0n, had a small figure and sh0rt hair. Her simple and practical way of dressing made me appr0ach her when we met f0r the first time. Talking to a friendly, p0Lite, fun and understanding w0man like her was really relaxing and c0mf0rtable. We had a long talk like tw0 long lost best friends wh0 had kn0wn each other f0r ages. Spending time with her was very encouraging. Aty Zafar was the kind of friend I really needed.
            I did n0t expect I w0uld meet s0meb0dy very special like Aty,wh0se remarkable acti0ns made me realize that I was n0t alone. She was always there t0 give me h0pe and a str0ng will t0 survive. We inspired and supp0rted each other by sharing everything we knew ab0ut autism. Alth0ugh,she was in Australia f0r three m0nths to have her autistic child treated,we kept in t0uch with emails and ph0ne calls to discuss the nitty-gritty of parenting an autistic child. Aty was so interested in autistic children that she dreamed of establishing a special school f0r them in Ind0nesia. unf0rtunately, life is often unpredictable. One day I g0t a call fr0m her husband.
"Ita,the d0ct0rs could not help Aty. She passed away ten minutes ag0," her husband t0Ld me. His frail v0ice was like lightning on a sunny day to me. The news was shattering and I trembled and felt helpless. I could n0t believe what I just heard and I was speechless. It was a sad thing to realize that Aty died of asthma.

            It was quite funny how many people are c0nfused because of our slightly similar names-Aty and Ita. Now that she was g0ne,n0b0dy w0uLd call me Aty anym0re. My best friend's death affected
me so much that I did n0t feel like doing anything, and as th0ugh I lost s0mething of myself. We always had the urge to talk to each other. For a while I was devastated. I felt so alone. I no longer had the energy n0r the will to fight for autistic children. Luckily, God sent me other friends. One of them was Adriana S. Ginanjar,or Ina. She g0t me to pursue Aty's dream-establishing a special school for autistic children. She even let us use her h0use f0r the school, which was finally established in February 2000 and named Mandiga (mandiri dan bahagia-independent and happy).
As a result, I have learned that t0getherness-being with other people who understand-helps us persevere. God creates differences am0ng people f0r a reas0n-to give us a chance to learn fr0m one an0ther. Taking care of an autistic s0n, I learned much ab0ut patience, friendship, t0getherness and surrendering to God. Life is ab0ut making ch0ices and living with the c0nsequences. H0wever, s0metimes we d0 n0t have as many ch0ices and as few c0nsequences as other people d0. Still, it is our duty to j0in hands and make our lives meaningful. We, as humans, must trust Him and He will help us be better pers0ns.